Who Am I, Really? Questions for Self Reflection

Who Are You, Really?

Are you looking to develop your self awareness? Address underlying conflicts or identify road blocks hindering your ability to achieve your true potential? Perhaps you’re on a journey to finding your true purpose and generate a greater sense of happiness.

Whatever your reason, becoming even 1% better is a step in the right direction. Mastering continuous self improvement will significantly increase your health and wellbeing.  

Considering you’ve landed yourself on this page, it’s safe to assume you’re a highly attuned human being with a desire to level up.  

THOUGHTS

Forewarning – The ability to look inwards and be truly honest with yourself can be uncomfortable! It is through this discomfort that you will grow and step into the best version of yourself. 

I feel that so many of us live our lives on autopilot and don’t even know it. We have a routine locked in that is hardwired into us from a young age. Are your daily practises in alignment with your true values and beliefs or are they simply what society has programmed us to do? Surely we are all products of our external environment… but the beauty of self awareness is recognizing the practices that no longer serve us.

Self awareness is a form of self care. 

Take a deep dive into your deepest thoughts, emotions, triggers, biases, fears, desires, skills, flaws, preferences and limiting beliefs. Improving your understanding of yourself can play a huge role in your overall sense of wellbeing and in turn improve interpersonal relationships.

TIPS

Grab a journal and write your responses down – pen to paper. Make sure to include the date so you can look back in the future and track your progress over time. Remember – No one else is reading these responses. If you want to get the most out of this exercise, try to dig deep and be honest with yourself.

Whatever direction your thoughts go, follow it! This is meant to be a guide with no strict order to follow. Answer some questions, don’t answer others. Pick the one’s that resonate with you most.

Be fully present in the moment. It goes without saying that cell phones ought to be put away for this!

Pour yourself a glass of wine, or don’t.

Have fun!

THE FOLLOWING IS A LIST OF QUESTIONS & PROMPTS:

1. How many people do you believe you’ve been in love with? Does love last forever?

2. When you’re old and look back on your life, what do you think you’ll be most proud of? With that answer in mind, do you think this is the area(s) of your life you currently prioritize most?

3. Visualize your future best self. Describe what skills they’ve mastered or qualities they possess that you have yet to develop.

4. What do you think is the biggest mistake your parents made in your upbringing/ what would you do differently as a parent?

5. What aspect of physical appearance do you love most about yourself and do you believe other people would list this feature first as well? If not, what part do you believe others would find most attractive?

6. Do you believe in second or third chances? Under what circumstances? Is there someone no longer in your life you wish you had given another chance to (or received another chance from) ?

7. What’s one piece of advice you’d give to your younger self (age 5, 10, 16, 25, 40 etc) ? Is this something you would have appreciated and followed, or do you believe it is a lesson that must be learned over time and through experience?

8. What qualities, values and traits do you value most in a life long partner? In contrast, what are some deal breakers for you and have you overlooked these in the past?

9. Can you recall a time in your life you made a sacrifice for your future self? How about something you gave up for another person? Do you hold any resentment? Looking back, would make the same decisions knowing what you know now?

10. What do you see as the biggest obstacle holding you back? (In your Career, Relationships, Reaching true potential, Finding Happiness etc)

11. Do you have regrets? (elaborate on them, or don’t) How has this shaped you into the person you are today?

12. Briefly Describe yourself as if you were giving an introduction to a stranger. Who are you, what is unique about you and what makes up your identity?

13. What mistakes have you made in previous relationships (romantic, business, family etc) that you’ve learned from?

14. The five love languages are ways in which we express and receive love. What is yours? Acts of Service, Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Quality Time, Gifts Received. If you are in a romantic relationship, what is your partners love language? Do you primarily express love to them in the love language they prefer, or are you guilty of expressing it through your own?

15. What personality trait do you love most about yourself and why? If you your friends, partner or family answered the same question, what do you think they would say about you?

16. Are you Happy with your Sex life? What do you enjoy most and what can you do to improve it?

17. Are you Happy? How do you measure happiness? What area of your life do you believe needs most attention right now (family, career, romantic partnership etc) to ensure you are?

18. Is there someone you have a difficult time forgiving and is this negatively impacting your life in any way? Can you move towards acceptance?

19. Are you Innately Creative? If Yes– do you believe it’s something you can be utilizing more often? What area(s) of your life in particular?

If no – Is this a trait you see valuable and would like to work towards learning/ practising?

20. What is something you know to be true, but have difficulty admitting to a) yourself and b) others.

21. What is your definition of success? What early relationship, experience or external influence shaped this belief system?

22. What toxic trait do you believe you possess? If you asked your friends, partner and family the same question, what do you think they would answer about you?

23. Do you believe that to some extent, your self worth is tied to your physical appearance? Do you believe your self worth is tied to your career and financial success? Describe how your life would look if you had everything you wanted.

24. What are your greatest fears? What can you do to prevent them from coming to fruition? If they did, what could you do to bounce back afterwards?

25. If you had no financial incentive, what career would you pursue?

26. List your guilty pleasure or vices. Are there any that you want to or are actively trying to change? What can you do moving forward to ensure you do?

27. What’s the most embarrassing thing that has happened or you believe could happen to you? Why is this especially sensitive/ hurtful to your ego?

28. Which of your family members and friends do you resemble most and why?

29. Do you believe you are confident? What is your biggest insecurity? What do you think ‘feeds your ego’ or sense of self worth? (ie. compliments, praise, social media, achievements, money etc)

30. What gets you excited about life presently and for the future?

Did you enjoy these prompts? Check out Deep Questions for Couples for thought provoking conversation starters to enhance your love life and strengthen emotional connections.